Payam, a man of conscious, from Canada :
DISCOVERING MY wife’s SECRET
After enduring some eighteen years of separation, I finally went to visit my family In Iran. From the very first moment of my arrival, they rolled up their sleeves to find me a suitable wife. Every candidate would shed off their Islamic veils and were being paraded around our house in tight and provocative outfits. In fact, throughout my whole life, I never ever liked dating a girl before knowing her for at least two weeks. But given the cultural restrictions in Iran, I was wondering what to do?
Around that time, a close friend of mine told the story of a desperate and despond family whose bread winner had been placed behind bars for vehicular man slaughter. He further continued to say that the victim’s family had filed a petition for financial retribution. For he and his wife could not afford to meet the victim’s family’s demand. Deeply affected by this tragic story, I decided to do something for this miserable family. The next day, I went to their home and visited the family. Their home was a shambles with a mother, her teen age girl and her fifteen year old son. The young son had to work grave-yard shift, after school, so as to cover their costs. It was such pathetic scene that I decided to do something to get the man out of jail. I thought that it was not going to be a big deal for me, as I had already spent a lot of money just to go to Iran. When I suggested that I was going to pay the retribution fee, Mina, the daughter of the family got so excited and said that she would never forget me and would be ready to do anything for me. Her pathetic words embarrassed so that I had to look downward. Thanks to God, everything went so fine and smoothly and finally I managed to get the man out of jail with a considerable amount of money. I even gave him a ride, upon his release from prison and dropped him off in front of his home. Having rung the doorbell, his family came to the doorstep while I watched an emotional reunion. They did not let me go and took me inside. I sat on the couch next to Mina, who now had a wide smile on her fabulous cheeks. I asked her not to reveal my favor for his father and keep it as a secret. After a few minutes, for some strange reason, I felt that I had fallen in love with her. Because after all, the first time her eyes landed on mine, it seemed as though the world seemed to melt into slow motion. We talked until midnight, while her family prepared dinner for that wonderful night. Our conversation covered everything from our platonic love to our future living together as a married couple. Unwilling to prolong any excruciating separation, I sent my family to her home to propose for her to be my future spouse. We eventually tied the knot, after some three weeks into our friendship without any intimacy. She was not like most girls raised in a noble family, she was all good manners and warm smile. The only thing that bothered me was some sort of sadness in her eyes. But I did not bother myself to ask her the reason. Mostly I assumed that it might be the separation from her family. When the time came and we were both seated in the giant plane bound to New York, I could still sensed the sadness in Mina’s eyes with tears welling down her nice face. After arriving in Vancouver, Canada, we settled in and started our family life. Mina tried her best to make me happy. Every evening when I returned home the aroma of fresh food filled the house. During our weekly gatherings with family and friends, everyone was full praise for her. I always had a great imagination that I had married an angel who spared nothing to make me glad and satisfied. She even tried to save some portion of her money in our joint saving account for a rainy day. She was really full of manners buying fantastic gifts and presents for me and whoever had some affiliation to me. I always spurred myself thinking, ‘I wish I could have found her years before.’ After some nine months into our marriage I thought to have a child. But, I thought, with Mina working in a prestigious company, it would be better to wait until my mother can join us, so that she could take care of our child. In between all this, my sister came here to visit us. She was impacted by Mina’s attitude towards me. She always praised her, as she would shower my pictures with her kiss whenever I was away. After sometime, I heard Mina, in our dining room, yelling on the phone, telling someone on the other end not to disturb her anymore. When I tried to ask her what the problem was, she just concocted some silly story about her friends asking for help. On other occasions, she pretended that she had had some sort of family problem. After some time, conveniently, she developed behavior problems. She got lonely when I was at work, I wondered, what should I do? Whenever I asked what was making her sad, she looked over at me and shook her head very matter-of-factly. After thinking about it, I decided I was not going to tolerate this kind of treatment. Then, at home one evening, looking for my sweater in our bedroom closet, by coincidence, I found an open envelope with our address written on it. I just pick it up and rushed into the bathroom. There was a crumbled letter inside which read:
‘Dear Mina,
You really trampled our long cherished romance, you turned and twisted it to an opposite direction. You broke all your pledges and vows you had already made with me. You compromised our platonic love by cuddling a man who just rescued your father from his shackles. Now you are trying to build a love without any affection and virtual emotion. This will be my last correspondence to you and I would indulge myself in drugs and alcohol as a gradual game for self-destruction.’ The next morning I woke up in a sweat, crying and in the end, I knew I would be on a slippery slope to depression if I did not tell her the issue. But I had to risk it. How long can you sleep in the same bed with someone, share every intimacy with her and continue to live a lie? Our marriage was not going to work out. It was really hard to get the words out. I felt like I had been kicked in the gut. Now the guilt and strain of having to keep her secret had sent me into a period of depression. It was then that I began to seriously consider telling her the whole story. I was desperate to share her secret with her to unburden myself of the weight I was carrying. As a matter of fact, I have read those stories run in Javanan, in the editorial column, about those unfaithful women who took advantage of their men once they arrived here and later joined their favorite ones. But Mina was an exception, she thought that she owed me to the end, even at the cost of sacrificing her long life lover. I waited until Mina got her green card. Then I told her that her secret was out. Having heard her secret, she stopped smiling with her eyes. The tone of her voice was flat. I thought that she was not going to like me anymore, that I was a lousy company for her. Mina could not hold back her crying and once again she said that ‘she would stay with me forever.’ But I did not want to stand in her way of joining her long time lover.
We finally had a peaceful breakup. I purchased her a condo and gave her a remarkable fund for living expenses. I am now pretty sure that she is in the process to bring her favorite love here and start a living life happier. I know that from the beginning, she feared that telling her secret would have had a detrimental effect on our relationship. I am happy that she will embrace happiness with a wide arm.